Relaxed Hair Tings

Pain is not normal. It should not be a characteristic of how you style your hair. This is the biggest lesson I learned. When I was still trying to find a good hairdresser this was one of the red flags I looked for. Some would say to just bear with it for a while, beauty is painful... No, it does not have to be. If a stylist took me seriously when I said my scalp is tingling already and made efforts to wrap up and get me rinsed out they got points from me. Usually stylists who insisted I wait longer were also the ones who did not listen to requests like not using  a rat tail comb to smooth the relaxer or detangle. My hair needs a lot of patience a lot of the time. While it is thick and very coily and can handle extra strength relaxer, my scalp is not made of steel.  I have already accepted the fact that my hair will never be relaxed bone straight. When people see my hair air dried they ask if I am going to relax my hair! I just smile. Now I am doing it all myself. I am happy to be able ...

This is 6months apart. November 2020 vs May 2021. It's been quite interesting being intentional about my hair. I am by no means on top of it all. Small things like remembering to take pictures to track progress and having a hair diary have been worth it. There's still a lot I am learning and working on like taking better photos or flat ironing my hair.  Slowly understanding what works for my hair, my time and circumstances has meant that I have to stop myself from certain things at times or push myself to do other things. Staying focused on the kind of hair and life I want to have keeps me grounded.  Have a great weekend!

Once you find a routine that works stick with it. Let's  talk about how I prepare for relaxer. This really marks the start of the process for me. My wash day before relaxer is where it starts. I clarify my hair with a clarifying shampoo to make sure all the build up is removed. This is currently the main difference to my normal wash day. I usually style my hair in a low bun and try not to manipulate my hair or scratch my scalp. You don't want an irritated scalp before relaxer as that can lead to relaxer burns on your scalp. The day before relaxer I part my hair into four sections and loosley twist my hair in smaller sections within them. I do this by starting the twisting roughly at the line of demarcation between the new growth and the already relaxed hair. Then I base my scalp with coconut oil. These sections make the whole application process so much easier and quicker. No fighting with your hair to get to the new growth. After wash day when I am dealing with my hair I only ...

Relaxing your hair is a choice you make. Personally having relaxed hair is more manageable and fits with my lifestyle.  I mentioned previously that as your hair grows out you  would have to retouch the new growth if you want to maintain the relaxed look. This step is also your choice. Some only get a retouch twice a year and that works for them.  I am still learning my hair and trying to find that sweet spot. You don't want to do it too often that your hair gets over processed. You also don't want to leave it too long that your hair is too hard to manage. Both lead to breakage.  While it is your choice when to retouch,  knowing your hair enough to tell that you've waited too long is important.  Knowing that you have enough new growth for the relaxer to be applied too is important.  There's no need to keep up with what other people are doing because everyone's hair is different. You can watch and learn from what they are doing and there's no need to jump on every...

A few thoughts on what a relaxer treatment is. I  am no professional just my experience.  A relaxer is a chemical treatment where relaxers reduce the curl by breaking down the hair strand and chemically altering the texture of your hair leaving a permanent effect on the hair.   Typically, the treatment does not straighten the hair completely. Rather, it softens very tight or kinky curls. Many find they still need to straighten their hair after having it relaxed if they want it to be completely straight. As your hair grows out you would need  a retouch to apply relaxer to the new growth. When to retouch varies for each person. Some over the counter straighteners can not be used on color treated hair. Personally it really makes my hair more manageable. Less tears and tangles. There are other kinds of hair treatments out there but this is more accessible to me. Have you tried other kinds of straightening treatments before?

Yesterday after a long day I moisturised my hair before putting it up for the night. I know some people like to wear their hair out especially after flat ironing it. I have decided to keep it up with my ends tucked away and so adding in some product doesn't bother me. Also it feels like winter is already here and when it's cold and windy my hair easily dries out. Today is my day to recover from the previous week and set myself up for the new one. I will mainly be around the house getting this and that organised at a leisurely pace. Once the work week starts it will be go go go. I am going to dig out some hair bands and see if I can use them to keep my hair out of the way.  I hope you are having a restful weekend. 

Day 2 hair is still feeling and looking great. I have been mostly at home and kept it under my scarf. It's still cold. I thought to share why I choose to relax my hair. All it comes down to is it's a lifestyle choice. My schedule is very hectic and having a whole day dedicated to washing my hair on a regular basis just doesn't work. Having my hair relaxed means that I can wash, style it and be out the door in an hour or less. My relaxer routine is roughly an hour and a half.  If need be I can breakdown the process into smaller chunks over 2days for example and not worry about my hair being a matted mess. Cowashing can also be a lifesaver for those times I need  to freshen up my hair without the full wash process.  I don't use heat a lot because of the amount of time needed on top of my wash or relaxer routine. Also I am no silk press queen. I am sure with more practice I will get better at it. Since deciding to go full diy I have decided to flat iron every 4 months when...

Today was relaxer day. This week was 10 weeks post relaxer for me and it was time. The process went smoothly and there was no burning.  As my hair gets longer it's started having looser curl pattern after relaxer. I also think getting used to the process helped. I had applied and smoothed my hair a couple of times before my timer went off at 15 minutes. I also attempted to flat iron it and dusted my ends. Picture was taken after the dusting in the smoke that is the aftermath of my flat ironing session. I am really happy with my progress.  My hair is soft and shiny, feels strong and has movement both when wet and dry.  The plan is to continue on a very minimal routine where I leave my hair as much as possible.  I am planning to post a log everyday for the next 30days with little  updates on what I am doing with my hair each day and some other hair thoughts and learnings. Let me know if there is a particular topic you want me to discuss. Most days will be the same...

As I am getting ready for relaxer and things are back to being more hectic. I decided to simplify my regimen for this next stretch as much as possible. So far I have noticed my scalp needs to be left alone and stretching longer than 8 weeks has resulted in a lot of shedding and some breakage. I am dialing things down quite a bit this stretch to try and find the sweet spot.  Without further rambling here it is: Daily  Moisturise every night before putting it up Wear hair in a bun/up do Fortnightly  Shampoo and condition  Airdry Moisturise  Wear in a bun/french twist/cornrows etc Monthly  Clarify  8weeks  Relax 16weeks Flat iron Trim/dust ends  How are things going for you? Is your regimen working well?

 As my hair grows longer I am excited to try new styles and build up my go to low manipulation and protective styles. This past weekend on wash day I decided to try braiding my hair into 2 braids. I like the simplicity of this style and you can move the part around so as not to stress the same area. No extensions were used. I have to say it was a bit more challenging than I thought it was going to be. I persisted and got a pretty good outcome for the first try. With more practice it will get better. I only used my moisturiser and sealed with coconut oil to keep things simple. I am currently just over six weeks post relaxer and that new growth isn't playing. Once I start wearing my hair out more this will definitely be one of my go to that will help give both me and my hair a rest. What are your go to styles?

 I am currently 4week post relaxer and am planning to stretch to 10weeks this time around. What is relaxer stretching? Also commonly referred to just as stretching, relaxer stretching is when you wait to apply relaxer to your hair after the last application. How long to stretch is an individual decision, however there are a few things to consider. Generally people stretch from 8 to 12 weeks to 6 months or even a year. The main reason for stretching is to ensure there is enough new growth to apply relaxer without overlapping previously relaxed hair. Overlapping can lead to over processed, damaged thin hair. What to consider when stretching One of the things to consider is how quickly your hair grows. If your hair grows out pretty quickly you may have sufficient new growth to relax at 8 weeks for example compared to someone who might need to get to 14 weeks for the same amount of growth. This also links into another consideration of how manageable it is. If your new growth is super t...

 It's been a while since my last update. Hope you have all been well, learning and making progress towards your goals. I try to use each relaxer stretch as way to find my ideal routine, products etc. Last stretch I had noticed some itching and flaking on my scalp and wanted to get to the bottom of it. It wasn't a major irritation but it made me feel like I needed to wash my hair more often. One ain't nobody got time for that and two the dollars I have are finite, also there was no guarantee washing more often would resolve it. I am looking to make a nice routine that I can manage in spite of what life may throw at me. Having said that I completely stripped back what I was doing. I stopped oiling my scalp. Initially I had stopped using my oil mix and went down to just olive oil but my scalp was itching before the week was out. I tried just my coconut oil and had the same result so I completely stopped. The itching and flaking completely reduced. When I deep conditioned I had...

  The below is what my regimen is currently looking like. I am still working on it as I learn what my hair likes and also trying to find products that I will stick to all the time. Daily - Put hair up in a scarf/bonnet when I go to sleep   Weekly - Shampoo and condition x1 - Moisturize and seal x2 - Oil scalp x2   Monthly - Clarify x 1 - Deep condition x2   Others: - Dust/trim as needed  - Wear protective/low manipulation styles 99% - Prepoo as needed   What is your current regimen and has been working for you?

 This is a shot of my ponytail from November 2020. My hair is growing which is great! I was really struggling with what to do with it being so short. Not that we were really going anywhere. I managed to gain some skills as well. One of the skills is doing cornrows myself. This has been so helpful in keeping my hair out of the way and reducing manipulation. I still maintain my routine with them in. I am not yet the best braider on the block but I am working on it. I plan to keep cornrows as part of my routine too. Another skill I picked up and have been practicing is tying head scarves. This has been useful on those super busy days when hair wasn't co-operating. I have also used this for when I want to keep my cornrows for another week where they are quite spent and I don't want to redo them. There's still a few styles I want to practice and also add maybe 1 more colorful scarf. As per my Instagram my current goal is for a healthy relaxed shoulder length ponytail. This is wh...

 This is a shot of me air drying from the archives,excuse the mess. Until I started my hair journey this year I never really took a lot of hair photos. I want to build that habit so I can track my progress. As the year draws to a close I am seeing posts on Instagram for hair goals. I really just want to be able to comb my hair and for it to be healthy. I asked myself what healthy hair means to me. The below is what I aspire to with my hair: 1. Hair is growing and I am retaining length 2. Healthy scalp free of dandruff 3. Shiny and smooth texture 4. Hair with elasticity and movement 5. No dead ends or split ends 6. Minimal breakage or shedding  I feel that keeping an eye on these things will help me maintain healthy hair. Should I veer off the right path they will help keep me in check. I will also keep my detangling game on and not get complacent!  What are your thoughts? What would you say is healthy hair?